Service.

While serving is often helpful, there are times it isn't. If there is one thing I have learned in working towards being a better servant of others, it is that sometimes, too much serving can actually just be annoying. So when is it too much?

Growing up, I always loved going into car dealerships with my dad and looking at all of the new vehicles I hoped to one day own. While this was always time well spent with my dad, there was one thing that always seemed to ruin it - the overly "helpful" salesman. It wasn't the person, but rather their over-commitment to service. There is nothing more frustrating than replying to, "How are we doing today?" with, "Just looking, thanks!" and then being followed up with all of the information about the newest model and how we could drive off the lot with it by the end of the day, all on a low monthly payment of $850. Oh, and not to mention they might even give us $100 on our year old vehicle. What a deal! Not.

If you've ever experienced this situation, or do in the future, there is probably one thing that was/will be going through your head - "LEAVE ME ALONE!!". Of course we don't say it out loud, we definitely think it though. But why? After all, they are just trying to provide service.

Because of these experiences at the car dealerships, I understood when I took the job at Home Depot what good service looked like. When a customer comes in the store and says they are, "just looking." they truly just want to look. The best way to serve them then, is to let them look. I learned to reply to, "just looking." with, "Sounds great, if you need anything feel free to ask. I'm more than happy to help." And more often than not, that customer came to me with questions. I wasn't actively serving in my decision to leave them be, but by leaving them be, I was able to better serve them than if I had tried to push the new sale during the first interaction.

So, how does this apply to leadership? Well, when we are serving our team, the same boundary should be respected. Offering help to a struggling teammate is always a good idea. Whether it be a small task or a personal issue, it shows you are concerned about their wellbeing and you are intentional to make that known. However, too many times I see leaders offering help, the team member denying that help, and the leader still trying to provide some sort of assistance. That is not serving, that is invading; just as invading and annoying as the high pressure car salesman.

Learning when not to serve is just as important as learning to serve. Serving well sometimes means not serving at all. Always offer the service to show you care, and provide it if requested, but forcing service is invasive and annoying. By learning effectively when not to serve, you will likely find people seeking you out for service in the future. More opportunities to serve means more opportunities to lead, and more opportunities to lead means more opportunities to grow.