Stand Out.

If there is one thing we know about leadership, it's that we don't know much. No single form of leadership works in every setting. Some leadership qualities resonate with certain teams and not others, and the truth is that not every theory of leadership is transferrable to every setting. However, what is true, is that some leaders have the ability to lead extremely well in a lot of different settings. Their leadership is highly influential and creates an almost unfathomable amount of buy-in. They are often the standout leaders that everyone sees as special, but they themselves have a hard time understanding what people see in them. Craig Groeschel refers to them as leaders who have it, researchers often refer to these traits as leadership paradoxes, and a few articles I was able to find referred to them as balanced. While there is no clear answer, there have been a number of studies showing one type of trait that seems to be present in all of these leaders.

Some of the best leaders, when you really dig into their real personalities, quite honestly make no sense to a common sense frame of mind. They are almost living polar opposites. There are many examples: Humble and Confident, Empowering and Controlling, Creative and Strict, etc. are among the many examples given in these studies. Sometimes referred to as a leadership paradox, this trait is often considered to be a determining factor of 'standout' leaders in these studies. So, what do they look like?

Well, they are quite literally what they sound like. Standout leaders typically don't have all of them; they tend to only have one, possibly two, that really stand out. They might be extremely humble and prioritizing of others, but at the same time extremely confident and seemingly important. They may be empowering, always giving away authority, but at the same time be extremely controlling. They might be incredibly creative, always looking to think up or try something new, but at the same time obedient to the script. It sounds contradictory, but it works.

I have three short examples I've had with these kinds of leaders and how effective they truly are because of these polar opposite traits.

The first is my dad. He has been a business leader for the better half of his life, most all of his career, and he has been very successful in leadership at that. I would say he has two of these standout leader traits mastered; humble and confident, and creative and strict, but for the sake of this example I'll share one. He is one of the most humble and generous people I know. I have yet to find someone who has the interest of others more in mind than my dad. It is never, "about Bill" and not only does he never come first in his mind, but even when making decisions that should be about him, he has in mind the people it will effect. However, my dad can also be extremely intimidating and can exude importance at times. He is humble and confident. It's part of what makes him an incredible leader.

The second example is my store manager from my time at Home Depot. Matt was extremely empowering. Placing his part-time paint associate as the Inventory lead (me) was a great example of it. A short time after that he decided to make me a supervisor and then a Manager on Duty not long after that. All examples of his willingness to empower others. However, Matt was also controlling. One of my favorite memories at The Home Depot was the first time I didn't get a project done as a supervisor. We were moving into the spring and we had just put the patio displays out, but the patio chair cushions needed some adjusting. I totally forgot about it, and the next morning I came in, I heard about it. All Matt said was, "Hey, do you remember what I asked you to do yesterday?" and I responded with, "Shoot. Sorry." That conversation ended with, "Get it done." Matt was extremely empowering, but when something needed done, it needed done. He was empowering, but controlling.

The last example is one of Jesus. If you are a fan of servant leadership, there is a good chance you look to the best example of it. (If you like servant leadership but don't look to Jesus in pursuit of it, I suggest you give Him a try.) Jesus fostered a variety of polar opposites. Jesus is fully God and fully man (Phil 2: 6-11), the Lion (Rev. 5:5) and the Lamb (John 1:29), the beginning and the end (Rev. 22: 13). We often sum these, along with the other examples not listed, into God being a Loving Creator, Supreme Authority, and Final Judge. He created the world and everything in it, but he also has authority over it all, and because of that, he is the one right to judge it. He created us out of love, but he is not hesitant to judge us accordingly if we don't accept Jesus as our ᴸᴼᴿᴰ and Savior.

Great leaders that I know and a great leader that knows the world, all inhibit these seemingly opposite traits that cause them to be standout leaders. The good news for you is, while you likely won't master all, or event most of them, you can master one or two. If you're already seemingly good at one thing, learn how to be just as good at its opposite. When you master both perspectives, you'll have a leadership trait that makes you stand out.